Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

thumb_up thumb_down -14

vote this down and i will DOX you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A dog is always in the pushup position.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why does Joel's breathe smell?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops