If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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derp

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Why is the white man sad? Because he watched the titanic

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kinda have a bad memory What are we doing again?

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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Why do cows have bad hand writing? because they don't have thumbs

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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To (down) Below: BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LOLOLOL! MWAHAHAHAHA HOHOHOHO HEEEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEHEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHA... Man I cant breathe! YUCK YUCK YUCK! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! AHAHA! HOHOHOHOHOHO HAHAHAHAHA!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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