roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

The diamond one below is hilarious.

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

Golf.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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