An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

One time i was sitting down

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

What came in like a wrecking ball? A wrecking ball.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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