What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops