Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Oh, go away

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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And now a word from our sponsors

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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if you can read this you dont' need glasses

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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