What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I put my baby in a microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

thumb_up thumb_down -11

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops