what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

what kind of dog can tiptoe

Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

Why does Jimmy Neutron have a big head? Heredity.

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

Q :Whats the difference between a truck load of bowling balls and a truck load of dead babies? A: I don't have a truck of bowling balls.

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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