why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops