a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Dude man, I'm high...

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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