John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

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Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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Women deserve equal rights.

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Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops