What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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