Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

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Q: How do you keep a carnival fish for more than a week? A: Place it in formaldehyde when you get home

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into a bar and shuffles his way through the intoxicated patrons. He finds the only open stool and quickly sits in it before any other see it. The bartender approaches him and ask: "What will it be?" The man replies: "Can I have a beer?"

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After a while, the bartender comes over to him and asks if he would like another beer. He says no and leaves.

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Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

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What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

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Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

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What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops