hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What would you find if you shaved chuck norris's beard? A chin.

What do you call a black man at school the janitor

kill yourself....with a cigarette

Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

no

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

Why were the Jews stuck in Germany? Because Joseph Rosenstein and his Jewish family missed their train out of Frankfurt to go to Paris, and so they had to stay another night in their hotel.

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

why is cancer a big thing because its bad

Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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