A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Feminism.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

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what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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