What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

whats ironic about a white van being white the driver usualy is not

Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Man: You know you're crazy when you talk to inanimate objects, you know you're Insane when they reply. Stick: I know, right?

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

guess what? WHAT? Idk.

a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

why is it good to be a fireman? because they save lives

You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

a man walked into a bar and said ow

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

A few lice were drinking wine on a scalp. It is quite strange that a person had wine on their scalp.

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

What did the mother give her family on christmas? Some gelt, dreidels, and Challah because it also happened to be Chanukah on Christmas that year

Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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