Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

Wanna hear a joke? no

what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

Knock Knock ... Knock Knock The man proceeds to leave.

PENIS :)

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would depend on whether it wanted to or not. If it did want to, it could potentially chuck an infinite amount of wood in its lifetime

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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