Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

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vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

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A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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whats the differnce between a white boy and a black boy? skin color

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops