Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

A man walked into a bar. I shot him

Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

A man walks into a bar... And orders a glass of beer to cool himself off after a long day at the quarry.

What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

what's the difference between a crocodile?

What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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