Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

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women's rights

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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What did the blonde say when she saw a box of cheerios? "Lovely, I think I'll have some of these for breakfast today. The wholegrain will be good for me."

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Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

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Roses are blue vilotets are yellow, obviously I don't know this rhyme so well u have aids and will die of cancer at the age of 25, and so will ur mom

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops