Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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