A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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Phew... it's gone.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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360 NO SCOPE

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What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

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i threw my line in the toilet the fishing was pretty shity that day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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