Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

What did the fat man do? He fell over...

What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

I have a really funny joke.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

Man U

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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