What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

haha

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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