Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

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whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

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How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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