Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops