Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

b

thumb_up thumb_down -16

an ethopian thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

snowglobe

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the Chef go to jail? He killed his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There's a black man and a mexican in a car who's driving ? The black man because the mexican is intoxicated and they both want to prevent serious injury or death

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Balboa. Watch as Apollo Creed`s nephews son is trained by Rocky Balboa`s grandson`s neighbor to participate in the new highschool musical will they win this years golden plate? Spoiler: No they did well but lost to Clubber Lang`s and Ivan Drago`s gay sons adopted lovechild`s ballet number. But people kept cheering "BALBOA BALBOA BALBOA!" As Rocky Balboa`s grandson kept yelling "ADRIAAN, ADRIAAAAAAN!" while a picture of Rocky`s grandchild is shown in the background together with the American flag. Moral: This script may or might not have been made for a quick cash in, anyway, its coming out the next radioactive winter 2705.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops