why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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Ehh

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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