How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

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"Hey! Did you get a haircut?" "No, I just started chemo..."

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Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

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Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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Yo Momma So Fat!

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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