A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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9/11

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

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No antijoke here.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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