Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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Jordan is pregant

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How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy almost unparalleled in marine history.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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