Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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How do you kill a blonde? By irreparably damaging a major organ. The same way you kill anything else.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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whats ironic about a white van being white the driver usualy is not

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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