Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

How many men does it take to wallpaper a room? It depends on how big the room is and, to a lesser extent, how wide the strips of wallpaper are. Also factor in variables such as ambient humidity.

Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

the economy.

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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