A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

A baby seal walks into a club.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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