What Do call a dog with an e A doge

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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Why was the man sad? His brother died.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Homo say what?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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