What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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two kids find a condom so they decide to show their mum the mum snatched it off them saying never to touch one of them again the kids went to their room "Mum sounded pretty angry about that thing "Lucky we didnt tell her about the yohgurt we drank out of it

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There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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There were three men in a race: Crap, Manners, and Shut Up. During the race, Crap fell and Manners stopped to pick him up, Shut Up kept on speeding. The police stopped him. Here is there converstation: Police 1: Whats your name? Shut Up: Shut Up Police 2: Wheres your manners? Shut Up: Back there picking up crap.

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

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this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

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How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

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civil rights

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

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What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

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Boxing on Boxing Day

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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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