What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

Knock knock. Who's there? Tim. Tim who? Tim Smith.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

?Three men walk in to a bar. one walks with a limp. The other two make fun of him and joke of his inability to walk as well as others around him.

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...