What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. One polar says to the other, "Pass the soap please." And the other polar bear says, "No soap, radio!"

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

rarw

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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