A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

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What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Two trees sit in a dark forest. Between them is a small hare. The wind blows hard and rustles the trees. The hare then looks up, and then forward. He hops away.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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