How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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"What the hell is wrong with you?" "..."

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What's the number 1 tip to burning stomach fat? Lighting yourself on fire.

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What is the difference between a pizza and ten dead babies? I dont have a pizza in my oven.

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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What is mary short for? Mary had an accident with a semi-truck and had to get both of her legs amputated.

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an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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