BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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Why? Because.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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Rebecca Black

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

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What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

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if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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