- Anti Joke

I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

Dane Cook makes a joke.

What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

Everything's looking fine, ma'am. Hope to see you again real soon.

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either