To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the gay guy go in the bar? To find some hookers

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

thumb_up thumb_down -15

If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops