What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

why did Suzy play jump rope with the neighbors kids? She had no legs!

69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

No!

what's inflation? a hollow cost.

What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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