What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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What's worse than a holocaust? two holocausts.

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Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

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Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

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A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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