Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

Your tell your girlfriend to make you a sandwich, she actually makes one for you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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