Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

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What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

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Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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knock knock go away!!!

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whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops