A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Black people having a Job.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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