When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar, has a few drinks, chats with some fans, and leaves. The very next day, Justin Bieber is out buying groceries.

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what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

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A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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