Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

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Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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Gay rights.

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why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops