The only difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is the taste.

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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Wanna Hear a joke.... Corey Jacobs is a FAT ASS

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Membean

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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How do you know a blonde's been in your refrigerator?? There's lipstick on the cucumber!

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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Hi

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how many blondes did it take to fix a nuclear reactor? 1 she was a black japanese rapist

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Not Suzy" "Why?" "Because she has no arms"

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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When a suicide-bomber went to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

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holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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