How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

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Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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I told a joke to my friends. They laughed.

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Someone stole my cookie from the cookie jar! So I bought another cookie.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The sun exploding.

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What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

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Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop.

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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Why is America such a great place to live? It's not North Korea.

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What happened when the black man was pushed off the cliff? His bones shattered upon impact and he died almost instantly

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2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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